A State of Mind

A State of Mind

She stepped into the outdoor area of the French-themed café that was few blocks away from her office. Working late became a habit that week. It was dark and drizzly, but her shoulder-length wavy hair survived the humidity. She turned her head right and looked for him with her black-framed reading glasses still on. And he was right there, in his usual spot, facing the other side and giving her a good view of his back. She took a deep breath and walked to his table with her brown blazer, beige pants and a black leather folder in her hand. “Hello” she said carelessly as she pulled a chair and sat next to him without looking at him. “Hey. You made it!” he said in excitement. “Yes. I did” she said in exhaustion as she removed her glasses and pressed on her nose bridge. It was then when she took a first look at his face. The cigarette was lit in his right hand and the smoke flew up to his mixed black/grey hair. She adored his hair because it was a reflection of his mature personality. “You look nice today” he said casually as he sipped his almost empty cup of espresso. “Don’t be silly. I hate winter and how I look in winter. Especially after spending the whole day at the office! You know me better than that” she said as she waved for the waiter. “Doesn’t change the fact that you look nice today” he repeated nicely. “Jasmine Tea, please” she turned to the waiter, ignoring his comment. “What’s so important?” he asked staring at her folder. “The usual. I need your opinion in those articles before I publish them” she said as she opened her folder and took out some papers. “Classic you. Will you ever type and e-mail?” he teased her as he took the papers and lowered his head to read. “And I can’t be classic because I analyze the stock market and the financial crisis?” she wondered. “Yes. You are a sophisticated Economist and not a novelist or poet” he said seriously. “Can we not go through this conversation again?” she said resting her cheek on her right hand. Without a word, he looked down and started reading. She stared at his serious face, his perfect nose and the woolen scarf around his neck with her thoughts far away. He picked up his pen and started drawing lines under some words and writing side notes. But she didn’t pay attention to her paper, the paper that was just an excuse to see him.

Time passed between some comments and brief discussions while she sipped her tea and acted focused. He looked at his watch after reading two articles: “I must leave now, but I’ll take the rest with me and read them later at night. I promise!” he said as he called the waiter for the cheque and folded the remaining papers. “Thank you” she said nicely. “What are friends for?” he said as he stared at his mobile and got up, leaving some money on the table without waiting for the cheque and an empty pack of cigarette.

She was too afraid to look back and see what she didn’t want to see. But her curiosity won. She turned around, and there she was, the gorgeous blonde. The world stood still at that moment and no body existed except for him and the blonde. He patted the blonde’s back warmly as they met by the entrance and walked away together.

The Economist turned one of her papers around and started writing:

Love is a state of mind..i don’t love you as much as i love myself around you..i don’t miss you..but i miss myself around you.. Let her have you..and let the whole world see you together..but in my state of mind..you’ll always be the one I have, yet wish for.. the one right infornt of me, yet not mine.. A lover who will only exist..in my state of mind..  

25 Sep 2011